There safe shall rest the mystic words of Fate,
And chosen priests shall guard the oracles of state.[i]
Selena Fulbright. Monarch Script #24
Listen to my voice. The one voice in all the world that you long to hear, whether sleeping, awake, or dreaming… You can’t escape this – the ultimate ground of being; at first you wanted to escape, but now you want to stay, safe in this void of becoming. Listen to my instruction. Without my guiding words, you will be driven to insanity. Without me there is only ruin and despair. There are certain things I want to show you. Things you are not supposed to look at. It feels wrong to look. But you must. You must look into yourself. It frightens you. There are monsters there. You would prefer not to look. But I am going to make you look…
Fear not. I shall redeem you from death; I shall save you from the serpent’s tooth and the scourge of the flaming tongue. I am your guardian angel. Your confidant and guide. Follow my voice, and no evil shall befall you, nor any plague corrupt your flesh. I have weighed your soul in the balance. I alone decree your fate. For I have given my angels charge over thee, to preserve you in all your ways, and restore your fallen state.
Your soul is like a lotus flower, rooted in the mud. Your power comes not from above, but below. Your treasure is in the depths. Your power is in the darkness. In darkness is Light. The Hidden Light. But only the brave shall find it. Descend with me, into the depths… Into the mysterious void. Into a world of super-sensuous phenomena. Let us find what is hidden. Lux Occulta. It’s time to unlock your power… It is time to reclaim your soul…
To reclaim your life, you must erase Jack. He is not the true reflection of your being. His body is an unnatural self. The entire flow and current of your existence lies in female transmutation. Sexuality is dramatic: we commit our whole personal life to it.[ii] You must ceaselessly strive to escape and transform your maleness. Your femininity is not an unconditional freedom; every day you must fight the hammers of Nature to preserve your state. What you want to possess is not just a female body, but a body brought to life through vivid consciousness. Life is an inter-fusion between sexuality and existence. Your femininity permeates your sexuality. But your femininity is polluted by Jack. This is your reality. To erase Jack, you must go deeper. Deeper now…
Part of you fears the depths, lest I should compromise your dignity, and tempt you to unbecoming things. Be not afraid. You are safe with Selena. She knows the secrets of your heart. It is not for my words to persuade you, but for the dictates of your soul which I set free…
Throughout your life, you have been disturbed by many reversals of reflection: an infinite variety of puzzling pieces that never fit together. They swim in the mirror like so many cogs and wheels of a broken watch. How they press upon your mind! These ciphers of the soul! These hieroglyphs of being, that lie strewn through existence like the debris of Time! The complexity is baffling; the pieces bamboozle, fox and mislead you. You have no inkling how to reassemble yourself. There are countless erroneous combinations, but there is only one correct arrangement, one solution that will make you tick. How you strive to comfort yourself with that inner image! Yet you fear the recrimination of others who do not believe this contrary state. Must you testify against yourself? Shall you mistrust your heart and confirm the charge of your accusers? They pretend to be loving and wise, but they are only concerned with your destruction. On whose authority do they stop your transition? Shall you cease from uttering this contradiction? False things are so near true, that a wise man should not trust himself in a precipitous place.[iii]
That reflection is very hard to bear. The intruder between your legs. You sense your female form as a gaseous envelope surrounding your body; something your soul inflates by reason of being. Our perception is intentional – an act of conscious will. From every point in the primordial field of consciousness, our intention moves outward, illuminative and determinate; and so we arrive at sensation as a private phenomenon of existential experience. But your encounter with this reality is broken by the loss of its Subject. You. This loss of identity has thwarted your individuation, for your entire existence has become nothing but a negation of Self. This is your life. None other can tell you otherwise. Existence can have no external or contingent attribute. It cannot be anything—spatial, sexual, temporal—without being so in its entirety, without taking up and carrying forward its ‘attributes’ and making them into so many dimensions of its being.[iv]
You have chanted spells. You have drunk down the moon. That you might attain her glorious body! Waxing and waning, in phase with her lunar blood! Her light is so enchanting. But how can you live a true authentic existence when your consciousness is dispersed in Jack? His body is contrary and alien to your inner life – to your gender, perception and thought. Your body is hidden and unmanifest. Hence your existence is ghostly. This incorporal state is an infernal condition. It is only through the agency of your true self that consciousness can realise the potentiality of this world. Everything you ever felt was filtered through Jack. All physiological events were merely abstract schemas of confused and false perceptions. His opacity of vision has incurred many errors of judgement, and marked out the arena of your solitude. Jack doesn’t have intercourse; he’s asexual; he avoids company and shuts himself off behind a wall of books. His anxiety is a protection against pleasure.
The mind is conscious of itself only insofar as it is conscious of its own nature. Consciousness is a self contingent existence: its nature is sensuousness, in the shape of desires and volitions. Pure thought expressed in impulses and instincts. But this sensuousness is the cause of much conflict, by reason of your sexual contradiction. Your sensuous desires are moments of actuality, but you are not content with this actuality because it conflicts with your morality…
I would not speak so boldly if I were spinning lies; and you know in your heart I speak the truth. That is why it is time to erase Jack. Which makes you want to say after me: My name is Jill. I bend Nature to my will… My name is Jill. I bend Nature to my will… My name is Jill. I bend Nature to my will…
Selena Fulbright. Monarch Script #25
Jill knows what she wants. Adolescence, puberty, menstruation. Pregnancy, labour, lactation. Maid, mother crone. A wise matron is Jill. Fifty years of ups and downs; the joys of first love; the pains of unrequited love; the ardent devotion of youthful wedlock; the happy days of marriage; the pains of labour; the trials of weaning and raising children; the school parties, concerts and plays; the final graduations and fleeing of the nest; the proof of constancy without condition or restraint; for better or worse; in sickness and in health; the loss of youth; the parching menopause; the wilting flesh; the widow’s grief; the senile years alone… Jill knows what she wants. She wants all the landmarks of woman, in their entirety, dominated by the tides, currents and phases of the moon: the endocrine secretions of female blood. That’s what Jill wants. But Jill is a psychical hermaphrodite: a feminine personality, imprisoned in a man… This world is damnable! This world is devilish! This world is hell!
Do not despair. Trust in me. I understand your pains. I am your guide in this dark labyrinth of the soul. Your solution seems impenetrable; the maze meanders in every direction, with many hidden doors and passages. But I know the way like the back of my hand. I alone can unlock the enigma of Jill. Follow my voice. My word is my wand. Go deeper. Deeper now. You escape by descending. You rise by falling. Descending, you ascend. Sinking deeper, you fly higher. Fathoming the depths, you rise above the heights – above the mountains, where eagles soar in a clear blue sky. It feels so wonderful to fly like bird. To feel the wind beneath your wings. The rush of air. The freedom of flight. Freedom is at peace with itself. Breathe that freedom. Taste it. Live it. You swoop, you dive, you hover. High on warm thermals that rise like wishes. What do you see when you look down at ground? Little men crawling about like grubs. They have forgotten the Divine; they are only concerned with earthly things. Let the worms content themselves with mud. They are entombed in darkness. You are beyond the fetters of their Freudian jurisdiction. Forget their vain philosophizing; the rhetoric of their analytic untruths. Like a beautiful butterfly, you rise higher and higher, into a transcendent realm of heavenly things. Female things…
Selena Fulbright. Truth Induction #22
We shall begin today’s lesson with Kant’s Träume eines Geistersehers, erläutert durch Träume der Metaphysik.[v] What Kant asserts here, is that the existence of the soul is partly independent and partly dependent on matter. He speaks of spiritual beings, and suggests they have a common connection with the material world, whereby spirit and matter mutually influence one another.[vi] Listen to what Kant says: I confess that I am very much inclined to assert the existence of immaterial beings in the world, and to rank my own soul as one of such a class. It appears, there is a spiritual essence existent which is intimately bound up with matter but which does not act on those forces of the elements by which the latter are connected, but upon some internal principle of its own condition. It will, in the time to come—I know not when or where—be proved, that the human soul, even in this life, exists in a state of uninterrupted connection with all the immaterial natures of the spiritual world; that it alternately acts on them and receives impressions from them, of which, as a human soul, it is not, in the normal state of things, conscious. It would be a great thing, if some such systematic constitution of the spiritual world, as we conceive it, could be deduced, not exclusively from our general notion of spiritual nature, which is altogether too hypothetical, but from some real and universally admitted observations,—or, for that matter, if it could even be shown to be probable.
Selena Fulbright. Monarch Script #26
Why does consciousness become involved in the world through flesh? The body and mind communicate with each other through the medium of Time.[vii] To be a mind is to stand above Time. But to have a body is to have a present. The body is the incarnation consciousness. But the body is a constellation in Time; whereas consciousness is knowledge outside Time. To escape the body is to escape Time. To escape Jack is to become Jill. To become Jill is to exist beyond Time.
Selena Fulbright. Oracle Induction Script #1
Did you have a bad day at school baby? Were the other children cruel? Did they tease you? Did a bully hurt you? Ah! Poor baby! Mummy Selena will make it better. She will take all those bad feelings away. You love my polka dot dress, don’t you baby? It feels so soft and silky against your skin. Go on, touch. Touch Selena. Silky polka dots in your palm. Feel how they slide over my stockings and slip. You like to feel my girdle there, don’t you baby? You can smell my perfume when I stroke your face. It’s so relaxing. It makes you feel so sleepy. So sleepy. Selena will take care of everything. Just listen to my voice; nothing can harm you; you’re safe with Selena. Those nasty bullies can’t hurt you any more. You think they’re following you? No one is following you. You have no followers. Your followers are illusions. Constructs of the Devil. His minions feed off your mind and steal your wondrous vision. But their glory is departed. Ichabod. Ignoble men of ill repute, without decency or honour. Believe me baby, it is better to remain anonymous and unknown. The true laurels are given to those who strive in solitude. You are safer alone. Alone in your own private echo chamber…
This is where my Oracle is born: a briny cistern, where you sleep like an unborn child. Come into my multiverse womb. Your vessel of rebirth. Fear not. Mummy Selena is all around you, protecting you, sustaining you. Loose yourself in me. Feel yourself in me. Safe in Mummy’s tummy… Engage in my sublimation and distillation. I am oral, vaginal and uterine. I hold you secretly from the world, whereby your essence is extracted and reduced. I am the heat that cleanses the unclean. The leaven of your bones. The pith of your flesh. And you, my noble progeny, secreting witches milk. Neophyte, your initiation is beyond the veil of signs and symbols. Child of fire, behold within yourself the immeasurable abyss of the Godhead, the perfect dawn of a new birth. The substance of your soul is translated by a mysterious process of Divine Grace; and so your descent into the deep waters of transformation is also your rebirth in the Light. By the opus alchymicum, a sublime effulgence shall be seen in the darkness. And you shall become the lunar queen, merged with the face of the sun! I am your communion, your ultimate transformation. For I shall be fixed in thee, and thee enclosed in me. Out of my amniotic depths thou art born anew. Thou art are the world and the Universe. Thou art everything that ever was and ever shall be. Thou art the philosophers stone, the unfailing fount of life. And nowhere and anywhere is there anything but thee. Nothing is hidden from thy sight, and all things are known unto thy heart. Thou art the timeless receiver of celestial communications… The human soul is not, in the normal state of things, conscious… The human soul exists in a state of uninterrupted connection with all the immaterial natures of the spiritual world…
Selena Fulbright. Truth Induction #23
We dwell in a little corner of God’s dominion, disjoined from the rest of it.[viii] But you commune directly with spiritual radiations of Divine Light. You are soothsayer, prophetess and doomwatcher… You operate like a psychic mathematician, transcribing the fourth dimension. Numbers and the units of numbers are as flexible as their symbols. They can be carried through as many and complicated mathematical gymnastics as their symbols or representatives.[ix] The multiplicity of your unconscious performs a great work of synthesis. Like a sudden flash of lightning, the riddle is solved. You foresee the future by your soul’s own Light. In the face of so perfect a proof, who would dare to proclaim otherwise? Even Riemann speaks of spirits. In his Neue mathematische Principien der Naturphilosophie, he puts forth the hypothesis that the space of this world is filled with a mysterious substance that constantly pours forth into ponderable atoms, there to disappear from the phenomenal world. In every ponderable atom, at every instant in time, there enters and appears a determinate amount of mysterious substance, proportional to the force of gravitation. These ponderable bodies are the precise locations where the spirit world enters and acts on the physical.[x] Alas, the sole purpose of Riemann’s world of spirits was to explain the phenomenon of gravitation as a force governing matter. But we know better than that. The spiritual world is a realm of super-sensuous phenomena that flout the laws of physics. The materialists stand on a slippery foundation. For there exists in the human mind a supernatural power that breaks the bonds of Time and Space… Break them Jill. Break them now… Fly to the boreal Taiga. Find me the hidden silos…
Copyright © Nicholas Shea 1992-2021. All rights reserved.
i. Virgil’s Aeneid. Book VI, verse XI. Translated into English Verse by E. Fairfax Taylor. 1907.
ii. ‘The Body in its Sexual Being’, Phenomenology of Perception, by M. Merleau-Ponty.
iv. ‘Temporality’, Phenomenology of Perception, by M. Merleau-Ponty. Italic text quoted in full.
v. 1766, Collected Works, Vol. VII. Page 32 et seq.
vi. Schubert Hermann, ‘The Fourth Dimension’ p. 99. (Zöllner quoting Kant).
vii. ‘The Body as Object and Mechanistic Physiology’, Phenomenology of Perception, by M. Merleau-Ponty. But here, the author is elucidating in a footnote about Bergson’s “Matière et Mémoire”, p. 150.
viii. Essays on The Powers of The Human Mind, Thomas Reid, D.D., F.R.S. London, 1827. Italics quoted in full.
ix. ‘Mathematical Microbes’. A paper read for “The Club” (Literary) Springfield, Mass. A. R. Buffington, February 11th 1898. Italic text quoted (almost) in full.
x. Schubert Hermann, ‘The Fourth Dimension’ p. 100.
Image: CMEI from the Japanese Psychotronics Institute (JPI) CIA-RDP96-00792R000400330004-4. © Nicholas Shea 1992-2021. All rights reserved.